The Vicar’s Umbrella

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Lyrics

[Intro - Tuba and piano, playful]

[Verse 1 - Male Baritone]
The vicar lost his umbrella in a barrel full of plums
A dentist found it Tuesday and was teaching it to drum
He kept it in a saucepan that he borrowed from the sea
The sea was rather cross about it, sent a note to me

[Verse 2]
The note was written sideways in a language made of glass
It asked about my brother and the weather and the grass
My brother is a chimney and the grass is in a cage
The weather wrote a memoir but it wouldn't name its age

[Chorus]
Oh the moon is in the cupboard and the cupboard's in the moon
And the spoons are having breakfast with a very nervous prune
And the prune has got opinions but it never says them twice
And the parrot in the attic charges everybody thrice

[Verse 3]
A postman with a piano came to visit yesterday
He played it with his elbows and he billed me for the day
I paid him with a button and a feather and a wink
He filed them in a teacup and he poured me back the ink

[Verse 4]
The ink was full of horses and the horses wouldn't speak
They'd taken vows of silence for a fortnight and a week
I asked them very nicely if they'd like a cup of tea
They galloped through the wallpaper and out into the key

[Chorus]
Oh the moon is in the cupboard and the cupboard's in the moon
And the spoons are having breakfast with a very nervous prune
And the prune has got opinions but it never says them twice
And the parrot in the attic charges everybody thrice

[Bridge - Slower, piano and voice]
Somewhere in a Sunday that I haven't reached yet
There's a hat that knows my name and a name that won't forget
The hat is very patient and the name is very small
And neither of them mention me at all

[Chorus - With harmonies]
Oh the moon is in the cupboard and the cupboard's in the moon
And the spoons are having breakfast with a very nervous prune
And the prune has got opinions but it never says them twice
And the parrot in the attic charges everybody thrice

[Outro - Tuba and piano, fading with chuckling brass]
The vicar lost his umbrella
The vicar lost his umbrella
The vicar lost his umbrella
And he thinks it very nice

[End]

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